Miss Diane

I’ve mentioned before now, some of the colleagues I work with. Today I thought I’d tell you about Diane.

Di and Cheryl inhabit the office which is the other half of the portacabin that Graham, Mike and I live in. Diane’s task is to complain about people, to put right mistakes that other people have made while keying stuff into the computer, and to rule the tea kitty with an iron hand. I ask you…a pound a month! Daylight robbery.

Anyway, one of Diane’s other tasks is to photocopy the puzzle pages of the newspapers so there’s always a Sudoku there when we need one, and the other day she was doing the crossword when she called on my assistance:
Di: “Horseman’s spear: L-something-N-something-E. Any ideas?”
Me:“Well…it’s a word you’ve heard of…”
Di: “Oh, I know – like jousting!”
Me:“Yeeeeees.”
Di: “Ah, but hang on – ‘joust’ doesn’t start with an ‘L’ “
Me:“Gnnnnnnn…”
Di: “It’s like, umm, you know…Sir Lancelot and all that”
Me:“Sir Whom?” 1
Di: “Sir Lancelot?”
Me:“Sir Whom?”
Di: “Sir Lancelot?”
Me:“Tchoh!”
Di: “Ooh, I see, it’s ‘Lance’, isn’t it?”.

Phooey.

Still, I’m in sunny Blackpool at the moment, nearly as far north as Simon and Jess’s lovely farm, but not quite. The weather’s been lovely all afternoon, while I’ve been charging round in the minibus doing collections from the railway station, taking people on trips etc: This evening, because I’m going geocaching, it’s just started raining.

1 I actually said “Sir Who?”, but I don’t want you all thinking I’m ungrammatical

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