“Dear Mr Gottlegog
Following your recent operation we have arranged an appointment for you to attend our outpatients department for follow-up checks with a consultant orthopaedic surgeon. The appointment is at 1:45 PM on Wednesday May 4th.
Lots of Love
The Rubbish Hospital”

Hmm, that’s nice.

Dear Rubbish Hospital
Thank you for your letter.
The second working day after a Bank Holiday, and the second normal day of the new financial year, and you expect my employers to give me an afternoon off? What planet are you on?

However, I understand you’re keen to see me again to make sure you’ve chopped the correct arm off etc: To help you achieve this objective I have arranged an appointment for your consultant orthopaedic surgeon to see me at my employer’s premises at 7:30 AM on Wednesday May 4th. Please ensure that he is punctual as I have a meeting at 8:00 which cannot be deferred.

Lots of Love
Paul Gottlegog

In more important news: I went to the gym last night. I didn’t do very much – just a few minutes on each bit of kit – but I used the rower, the cross-trainer and the cross-country ski machine for the first time since my wrist first became bad in July 2002. And this morning the wrist didn’t complain or anything – I hate to admit it, but I think the Rubbish Hospital may have done the trick.

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