On Clocks

Cripes! That took a bit of working out. I thought I couldn’t get in here to start with but it turned out I don’t know how to spell my name.

Well, I seem to be here. It’s me – the balder-than-Paul-but-not-as-short-and-fat one. Paulo Gottiglia di Girra has asked me to step into the breech and provide this evenings dollop of inane comment. So I will.

Tonight is the night when the clocks go back an hour and as everyone knows this is really good news because it means we all get an extra hour in bed. Having the extra hour in bed seems like such a nice bonus at this time each year.

Actually gaining the extra hour in bed is so nice that it seems silly to limit ourselves to getting it only once a year. When I am king of the whole world I am going to decree that the clocks will go back an hour every single night! This will mean that we all get an extra hour in bed every night and I am sure we will all be happier people for it.

There will be no more worrying about staying out late on a “school night” because you will be able to sleep it off with your extra hour. That early morning feeling that you get when the alarm clock goes off just a little bit too early for your liking will be a thing of the past. Morning sourpuss grumpyfaces will no longer exist, and therefore nobody will go to work in a bad mood. If people who work at the Ministry of Making Wars turn up to work in a happy mood instead of a grumpy mood then they will be less inclined to declare war on other people and we will all live in perfect peace and harmony.

It cannot fail and is so simple. Why hasn’t anyone already implemented it?

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