Yellow Peril

Those of you who drive regularly will probably have experienced average speed cameras by now. They’re big yellow cameras up a pole at the start and finish of motorway road works, and often partway through as well. They recognise your number plate and time how long it takes you to get through the temporary speed limit, and if you’ve done it in too short a time, you get a nice little fine in the post, and points on your licence. Apparently these devices are known as “Yellow Vultures”.

Coming home from the Far North1 this evening, I passed through three sets of road works, each guarded by yellow vultures – and being the only one awake in the car, I started to have one of my “when I rule the world” musings…

So, when I rule the world, you’ll be able to register a credit card with the authority that runs the yellow vultures: If you exceed the speed limit when there’s work going on, the fine automatically gets charged to your card…however, if you stick to the speed limit at a time when there isn’t actually any work being done, you get the cost of a day’s road tax refunded to your card. Given that it seems that road work only gets done for a couple of hours a day, five days a week and never within two weeks either side of a bank holiday, most drivers could get their whole road tax back over the course of a year.

Alternatively, of course, all that money going back into the taxpayers’ pockets, and therefore being unavailable to pay MP’s dodgy expenses2 might inspire someone in authority to see that the roadworkers actually get on and get the bloody roadworks finished. Either way, motorists win.

Amazingly, I seem to have had a flight of fancy which is less bizarre that the Prime Munster’s latest wheeze.

1 Hertfordshire
2 Or mine, come to that…

Comments are closed.