Educational Video Part 2

Smello chums: I’m Paul and these are my friends Chris and Martin, welcoming you to our latest educational video, “Man Shopping Part 2: At the DIY Store???.

Once again, our challenge has been provided by Chris’s girlfriend, and she’s asked us to get a paving slab, a spade, and a bag of assorted cable ties: Since the cable ties don’t appear to be related to the paving slab and the spade, we’re not sure what they’re for – maybe Chris is in for a surprise later. Anyway, time to start our challenge, so follow us into the store.

And straight away you can see the hardest part of this challenge: There are no power tools on our list, but here we are right inside the door faced with a complete armoury of them. Obviously we’re going to be in severe trouble if we go back with Power Tool City in the back of the car, so we’ve got to resist the temptation somehow, and here we’re using the method of “Reminding ourselves how much trouble we’re going to be in already when she sees how much booze we bought in Asda???. You may have your own favourite method, but whatever you do, have your tactics ready before you enter the store.

OK, we’re past the power tools: There’s another similar challenge for us later, though, so we need to stay alert. In the meantime, you can see Chris has found a spade, although he did it by asking a member of staff: We’ll have a word with him about using girly tactics later. And look, here are the cable ties – we weren’t told how many, or what size, to get, which gives us the opportunity to buy the biggest multipack in the store. Just the paving slab to go.

Yes, I know we haven’t got a trolley – if we were wusses we wouldn’t be presenting a video like this, would we?

You see what I meant about another challenge? They’ve put the paving slabs right next to the concrete mixers. I suppose if we went back with one of these we could use it as a mega-food mixer for the barbecue, but we’d be in so much trouble we really have to resist. So here we are with our paving slab, and all we’ve got to do is pay and go. You may have noticed that Chris’s nose is bleeding: He’ll remember next time not to go asking for directions, and the spade’ll clean up a treat.

So that’s another video made – break the tinnies out, Chris. And stop whinging about the bloodstains, it’s only a Swindon Town shirt for goodness’ sake.

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